If you’ve been a long-time follower of Becoming Bailey, you’ll notice there’s a change to my website: the comments section is no more! This was actually entirely by accident– somehow as I was redesigning my website, I accidentally removed that section entirely. After spending a few hours attempting to restore it with no success, I decided to view this as an opportunity to evaluate my thoughts behind blogging and blog comments honestly.
My thoughts on blogging and social media have changed a bit since I first started this blog as a 20-year old college student, especially now that I’m transitioning into motherhood. There are some aspects of my life that I want to keep personal, especially once Baby Cummins arrives. Not everyone should know everything about me, and I don’t need everyone’s feedback on every aspect of my life. I felt so strongly about this that I even considered closing down this website entirely.
However, my husband was very insistent that I keep blogging. As he pointed out, this website is a wonderful way to stay in touch with out-of-state family and friends. It’s served as the basis for my family yearbooks/scrapbooks and will do the same for Baby Cummins’ baby book. Whenever Andy is away and missing me but I’m unavailable to talk, he turns to my website to read my thoughts and hear my voice. Plus, writing allows me to better articulate my thoughts in a way that I sometimes can’t verbally express. As Andy pointed out, I am a writer at heart.
But things have changed in my life over the past 7 years. I find myself wanting to spend less time in front of my computer and more time enjoying real life. I now work from home in the same office where I previously blogged, and at the end of a workday, I want to be away from my screen. As Baby C arrives, I know I will want to spend more time as a family instead of “doing my own thing.”
So as a compromise to deleting my website entirely, I decided to remove comments from my blog.
No comments are less stress.
One of the things that stressed me most about blogging is replying to comments. As a type-A personality, I feel pressure to respond to comments quickly, but as a perfectionist, I found myself procrastinating on replies because I wanted to say the “perfect” thing. Also, to moderate comments, I needed to be on my laptop. Knowing I will be spending less time in front of my computer once Baby Cummins arrives, my already-slow response time to comments will get even slower. I know I shouldn’t feel obligated to reply to every comment, but I also know myself well enough that I will feel compelled to respond.
No comments allow me to enjoy writing more.
As a lifelong people-pleaser and Enneagram type 1, I don’t particularly enjoy opening myself up to criticism. Logically, I know to not take it personally, but realistically, I do. By removing the opportunity for people to provide criticism, I worry less about others’ reaction to my writing. I’ve found myself enjoying writing more than ever and actually want to write more than I have in the previous months.
But how do I continue the conversation with you?
By shutting down comments, I’m not closing the door on community entirely; after all, if I didn’t want anyone to read my writing or communicate with me, this website would be private! Instead, I’m just shifting the conversation from my blog to my favorite social media platform– Instagram. For those of you who don’t Instagram, sending an email is an option as well. I can respond to both from my phone, which means I’m more likely to reply promptly. And as a bonus, I’ve noticed that comments on Instagram or email are generally more polite than some of the comments I’ve received anonymously on my blog 😉